nice perfectionism fatso

i never hated marathon training. i could never relate to people who would complain of the hours and hours lost. the constant soreness. the runs they’d dread. i’ve thrived on the structure and something i’ve had to be accountable to.

though i always forget about the exhaustion. suddenly there is not enough sleep ever. my patience becomes minimized, and tiny things like calling my health insurance company, or like, opening the mail, seems to be a huge ask.

but i think my current plan is too much. and i think having a full time job and running 9-12 miles after work, 5x a week is perhaps not reasonable.

last week was 54 miles, and this week 56. i am running back to back medium long runs, and it’s just too early in the training cycle for me to be this burnt out. why am i doing this? why do i have to be so extreme? it’s my impatience to be better. i already had one injury this year, i know what over exhaustion leads to. i’m not willing to keep up with the nutrition that this training plan calls for, and I’ve already lost three pounds in two weeks from all the miles- hey, i’ll never complain about drops el b’s, but, i know better.

last night, in 900 billion degree humidity, i left work to bang out 7 miles before meeting up with my team for 5. it was one of those runs that just immediately sucked. it was as if there was no air. i’m also trying to not run with headphones anymore, so it’s me and my brain. which. is an interesting place. but not quite dance music peppy.

so i was slogging along and ran into a girl from NBR, whose a run leader for the long runs, and is a really strong marathoner (like, really strong). i whined at her for about 20 minutes and she agreed that my plan has too many miles for quality speed runs, and that i’ve got 16 weeks to work- i don’t need to throw it all away in my first few weeks of training.

i felt really good after we spoke- i forget sometimes that i love this. that this is something i do for fun. that i can do this. that i don’t truly have ‘everything riding on this’. i forget that i cannot eliminate time from training. no matter what, i need the next 16 weeks to build up my speed endurance. and i can’t compress what time will give me into a handful of workouts.

the rest of the run was fun- i met up with my team, and led the slower pace group. there was a nice pack of us, and it was absurd how hot we were. we ran up to the Pepsi Cola sign in LIC, chugged some water and then got back down to williamsburg just before the rain started. only three of us stayed for core. i couldn’t have been more sweaty- it was a joke. i was happy. i went home happy. i have to remember why i do this, because i actually like this process. and I’m on a team with awesome people who are in the same boat.

the ever learning process of marathon training. maybe one day i’ll nail it.




  1. i love the structure of marathon training too but the exhaustion gets to me as well. It does look like you’re running a lot but it’s good you’re self aware and can make changes now


  2. One thing about starting early for marathon training is that you have plenty of time to adjust your training plan and have enough time to complete your mileage. I’m struggling to do 3-4 runs a week and I know that it will get worse as the training plan progresses and the distances get longer.


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